Drink it in...big hearty pull. God is he awesome. Have you glanced at his stats so far? They're insane! 19 games, 59 at-bats, 18 hits. Here's the catch, four of those 18 are doubles and nine are dingers. He's practically averaging a dinger every six at-bats.
Meanwhile, Bill Hall still sucks. Russell Branyan is making Bill Hall look like a chump right now, taking only two weeks to match him in dingers. How great is Russell Branyan you ask?
- Russell Branyan can kill two stones with one bird
- Apple pays Russell Branyan 99 cents every time he listens to a song
- Russell Branyan can eat just one Lay's potato chip
- Russell Branyan counted to infinity - twice
- Russell Branyan can slam a revolving door
- Russell Branyan ordered a Big Mac at Burger King once, and got one
- Nobody does it like Sara Lee, except Russell Branyan
- The bible was originally titled "Russell Branyan and Friends"
2 comments:
-If Bill Hall hits a dinger and Russell Branyan hits a dinger, Russell has hit more dingers than Billy.
-The Bogeyman checks his closet for Russell at night.
-Russell does not sleep. He waits.
-As a child, Russell took a vacation to the hills of Tuscany, touring a then innocent convent. The convent turned Russell into a man and 9 months later each lady gave birth to a child. Those kids went onto to become the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the last undefeated NFL Champions in history.
- When Russell Branyan does a kegstand, he holds the keg above his head
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